Moar updates

It's  been a long time, mostly due to the move and lack of internet until a few days ago.

Lots has happened!  We made the move to DD's area, and found a house.  The boy started high school up here and is settling in well, while the girl has also settled in well at her Dad's.  We got a mini van and will be selling my car.  All moved into the new house, though there is still some unpacking and organizing to be done, as there isn't much time left before babies!

I'll be 35 weeks tomorrow, making it crunch time.  We did indeed find out that both babies are boys, awhile back.  I have a lot of Dr's appts and tests these days, and am hoping these little guys will come out soon.  I'm anxious to see them and be able to stop worrying all the time.  I have non stress tests every week, ultrasounds every 3 weeks, and Dr's every week now.  They're keeping a good eye on us.  Ended up at the hospital today because Baby B hasn't been moving very much, but everything is seemingly fine.  They're sending me for an extra ultrasound on Friday after my non stress test.  They are big boys, measuring ahead by a full week, so hoping to find out how big they are on Friday.  At my last ultrasound, one was 4 lbs 11ozs and the other was 4 lbs 8 ozs, give or take.

That's the basics of it all.  Yay for having internet back!

All the things

Lots to update!

I went for my ultrasound, which took forever.  We found out that one of the babies was a boy, but that the other one was in hiding and wouldn't show us their parts.  Heartbeats were really good and she said everything looked great.  Fast forward to the next week for my Dr's appt.  He said my ultrasound results were great, and that they were as big as they should be, heartbeats were fine etc.  I have to have the Rhogam shot, due to the fact that my blood type is A-, and DD's is A+, but I don't have that until 28 weeks.  I also have to go for glucose testing (which sucks) to check for gestational diabetes.

In the meantime, DD's mom had said if they couldn't find out the sexes of the babies, she would pay to have a 3D one done, so we booked that and went the day after my Dr's appt.  It was really cool to see the babies in 3D, moving around, one was rubbing it's eyes.  We did also manage to find out that the other one, was in fact, another boy!  So, we are having twin boys, fraternal as far as we know.  I spent a couple days up at DD's, meeting some more family, bbq at his sisters, and just in general hanging around.  Had a really great time, but was totally worn out!

The pictures we got in 3D of the babies weren't as good as I had expected, partly due to the fact that the babies do not have fat yet, and therefore their facial features are still a bit alien looking and flat.  We'll try again at around 27 weeks to see if we can get clearer pictures.

Things are in progress with the move.  I have most of my room, and the boy's room packed up and ready.  The girl is mostly moved into her dads house.  Living room and dining room are also mostly done, and basement has been entirely cleaned out.  Garage sale next weekend finally, hoping to get rid of a lot of this stuff!  Whatever doesn't sell, I will load in the car and take to Valu Village to donate.

So, things are going very well.  My Dad still isn't talking to me.  There's not much I can do about that, and don't care to put myself through the stress of it all.  The boy is getting very excited about moving and camp and all the other things coming up.  5 weeks or so, and we'll be out of here :)

Now I'm just impatient

Not much new to update with, which I guess is probably a good thing.  I had a Dr's appointment last Monday and all was well, only gained one pound, which I will not complain about. I lost 5 at the beginning and have only gained back 2.  As long as the babies are getting bigger, it's ok.  Heard a heartbeat again, my OB explained that with twins it's almost impossible to get separate heartbeats until later on (without an ultrasound to zoom in on individual ones) due to the fact that the heartbeats of the babies basically kind of echo and transfer through the amniotic fluid making it difficult to distinguish whose is whose.

Heartbeat was at 142 bpm which is good he said.

I had to go to my regular Dr (nurse) for something unrelated, and got to hear a heartbeat again and it was at 148.  I guess they bounce around just like ours do.  My ultrasound is booked for the 30th.  We are really looking forward to finding out the sexes of the babies and seeing them and just knowing that everything is ok.

DD has already booked that day off work so that he can be there as well.  Taking the boy with me as well since the girl has been to an ultrasound and a Dr's appt with me already, so now he gets a turn.  My mom will come with me as well if she's able to.

Otherwise, things are the same.  Getting bigger, hotter, and a little crankier at times.  Yay hormones!

Closer to halfway

I will be 15 weeks tomorrow!!

I totally didn't update after my last post.  I did get to hear one heartbeat, which was 152 bpm. He said at this stage it was too hard to try to find 2 separate ones as we could just find the same one 3 times.  I go back on the 12th of June, hoping we can maybe hear both this time.  Ultrasound will be booked for the end of June, hate having to wait that long.  Just want to see them and find out what we're having!

Still haven't felt any movement yet either, or at least I don't think I have.  Hopefully soon!

Gotta pee in a cup today

First appointment with the OB today, I saw him before when I miscarried and know from being there that on every appt, you go in and pee in a cup with this strip thing in it, I assume to check for sugar and protein.  At my last appointment with my normal provider I was told I'll need to have a glucose test sometime around August, as the chances for gestational diabetes are higher with twins.

I've been feeling very anxious these days, so really hoping they can hear the heartbeats today, so I can be reassured a little.  Not sure why I'm anxious, I'm 13 weeks today, so I'm out of the immediate danger zone, no spotting or cramping, but just....not feeling pregnant I guess. I've never really had any symptoms with this pregnancy and that bothers me.  I don't feel like I'm getting any bigger, though I know I am because my work pants are smaller.  All in my head I suppose.  I'm hoping to talk the Dr into booking another ultrasound soon.  Will make me feel a lot better, and would like to know the sexes of the babies.  Will update later when I'm home from Dr's.

Taco dip and watermelon

Taco dip has been the new craving.  With watermelon coming in at a very close second.

I woke up at 3am this morning, starving, and ran downstairs to eat a handful of chips with taco dip, and followed it up with a few chunks of watermelon.  Fell asleep fairly quickly after that.

Went to the Dr's on Monday, he could not find the babies heartbeats but said it is not unusual at this stage and not to worry.  I've lost 3.5 pounds, also no reason to worry, and all my bloodwork and ultrasound results were normal.  Twin A is on the left, twin B on the right, with B being slightly bigger than A.

Was told that due to a slightly higher chance of just about everything, I'm considered higher risk and was referred to an OB.  I chose to see the same one from when I miscarried.  I go see him next week, hopefully will hear some heartbeats, as I will be 13 weeks when I see him.

He'll be able to refer me to an OB when we're getting ready to move as well.  Hoping for another ultrasound soon so we can see what kind of babies we have!

Shit just got real

DD came down this weekend, and took today off work as I had my ultrasound today.  I'm so glad he was here for it.

We had to pick up my daughter from school on the way, and made our way to the hospital.  I had to pee.  A lot.

They got me in almost right away, which was nice for a change and I got rid of my pants and got on a gown and hopped up onto the table.  I've been a bit of a nervous wreck leading up to today and was anxious to see the little bugger.

Nice cold gel, made me need to pee even more.  I'm trying to look at the screen but nothing really makes sense to me.  The lady reached over and I could hear clicking and then all of a sudden could hear the heartbeat!  She looked over at me and I immediately got tears in my eyes.  She said 'That's a good sound, isn't it?'

I just nodded, wasn't able to say anything, but then told her how I had just miscarried in January and that it sounded incredible. She said she saw it on my chart and thought I might want to hear it. She handed me some kleenex and apologized, saying she didn't realize I was crying.  I said it was alright, and then she said 'Well if you weren't crying before, you would be now..'  And my heart sank and soared all at the same time.  I asked why...and she turned the monitor towards me and said, 'Here is the baby.....and here is the other one, there's 2'

I almost didn't believe her if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes.  I just started crying and staring at the screen.
She brought DD and the girl in after that, and said 'Do you want to tell them, or should I?  And all I said was 'Show them'

She pointed at Baby A, and then moved the thing over and pointed at Baby B.  All I heard was the girl laughing and she had a huge grin on her face, and DD just very quietly said, 'Oh wow.' She let us hear each of the heartbeats again, and gave us a picture that I let DD take home after I scanned it.  She didn't have a very good picture showing both unfortunately, but said I'd probably be having another ultrasound done in a few weeks.

When I got back from dropping DD off to catch his bus home, the boy was here, so I pulled up the scan and showed him where the head, and body was and then I paused and said.. 'And this is the other head and body.'

Needless to say, everyone seems very excited, but we're all in a little shock and I think today has emotionally drained me.

Still baking

The bun is still in the oven.  I have surpassed where I was in the last pregnancy.  8 weeks today.  I know I should be feeling fairly relieved but I am still rather panicky.  Also, this constant peeing can lighten up anytime.  Honestly though, I don't even mind it.  It's a symptom I'm grateful to have, along with the others.  I'll take all the symptoms if it means my little bun will keep on cooking.

My ultrasound is booked for the 28th, I called today to ensure that DD will be able to come in and see and that we'll get a picture.  2 and a half weeks to go and then we can see our new little family member. Next Dr's appt on May 5th, was told we should also be able to hear the heartbeat by then as well.  It's starting to be real and I'm still trying to hold off on the excitement and happiness.

Apparently baby is the size of a raspberry now.  I love raspberries.

*drumroll*

The Dr's office just called, my bloodwork results have come in!

My hCG is currently (well, as of yesterday) at 38 453!  This is right in the bracket it should be for 6-8 weeks, and I'm told it's a good indication that things are moving along nicely!

The good news...

On March 15th, DD came down for a visit.  I stopped at the Dollar Store and bought 2 more pregnancy tests.  I didn't know if I was late, or if my cycle was just still not back on track, as I had only had one period since the miscarriage.  DD was surprised as I hadn't said anything to him.  Took one test that night, it reluctantly came out positive after a few mins.  We decided to wait until the next morning to take the other test, which also came out positive.  DD didn't have much reaction this time, we were both afraid to be excited and/or happy.

Back to the Dr's, had bloodwork done to verify pregnancy and it was positive.  hCG levels were at approx 126 which corresponds with the date.

As of right now, I am 7 weeks, and coming very close to when I lost the last one.  It's terrifying.  I'm trying to  not stress out and make things worse, but at the same time I am also expecting the worst.

I have had no cramping, or bleeding.  I had more bloodwork done yesterday, to test for a variety of regular prenatal things, as well to check my hCG again.  He should have those numbers by today or tomorrow.  They should be somewhere from 36 000 to 37 000.  Here's hoping those numbers come through.

The bad news...

On January 8th, I came home from work and was spotting very slightly.  I panicked and ran to the ER.  They booked me for an ultrasound the next day to check on things.  I had the ultrasound and had to come back later in the afternoon for the results.

The Dr's there was way less than helpful and could only tell me that 'something' was irregular, but that they had seen the heartbeat etc.

I went back to my own Dr's office, and was told I was experiencing a subchorionic hematoma. It's a pooling of blood between the membrane around the embryo and the uterine wall. I was told it only raised my chance of a miscarriage by about 10%. I was put on bed rest and had to take a leave of absence from my job.  I had no cramping, very little bleeding, but was still terrified.  On the 12th, things went downhill very fast, and I started cramping and bleeding very badly.  I lost that baby, here at home, around 9pm that night.  I was almost 2 months along.  It was devastating to me, and I lost part of me that night as well.  The next month consisted of lots of bloodwork, Dr's appts and another ultrasound to make sure everything was gone.

DD was pretty upset, though not outwardly.  I know him well enough to know when something is bothering him, but he won't talk about it.  He gets very quiet and tends to stay to himself for a little while.

I went back to work...we talked about trying again at some point, and life went on.

History

My boyfriend (DD) and I met in January of 2013 and we were officially dating by February.  He lives 2 hours away by car, 3.5 hours away by train/bus.  It's not ideal, but it works.  Until now.

Shortly before New Years I found out I was pregnant.  I took a test on the night of the 26th, fully expecting it to be negative.  So sure, in fact, that I had bought 2 tests from....the Dollar Store.  I didn't want to bother wasting money on expensive tests because I was so sure it was negative.  I had been on the pill for years.  It was positive.  Another test Friday morning was also positive.  Well shit.  Had no idea how DD would react.  He has no kids, and is basically a big kid himself. It took him 8 months to even tell me he loved me.  I went and picked him up that night, as we were doing our late Christmas together.  He loved my gifts for him and while I was trying to be excited about the soft air gun he got me, he knew something was up.  He asked me what he did, and I laughed and said no, it was nothing he did...so he said 'ok, what did *you* do?' and I laughed again and said it was more along the lines of something *we* did.  Blank look for about 15 seconds and then suddenly 'Noooo (disbelief) you're pregnant?'  Yep, sure am.  His first question?  'I thought you were on the pill?'  Yeah, so did I.  The rest of the night went something like this:

(After a half hour or so of it sinking in)

DD: I'm gonna be a Dad?  (Disbelief again)
Me:  Sure looks that way

(15 mins later)

DD:  I'm gonna be a Dad.  (Not so much of a question now, getting more towards it being a statement)
Me:  Yep..

(Few more minutes goes by, with some idle chit chat, questions etc, and then...)

DD: (who turns to me very suddenly and surprises both of us by suddenly yelling..)  DIBS ON THE NAME!!!

Me: No, you can't do that!

My mistake, apparently he *can*

Anyhow, after numerous funny and serious talks, we were on board.  Both fairly terrified...after all, my youngest had just turned 13, while my oldest was 16.  Starting over with an infant?  I had always wanted more children but over the years had gradually accepted it wasn't going to happen and was learning to enjoy my freedom instead of mourning it.  I made an appt with the nurse at my Doctor's office, who confirmed that, yes, I was pregnant.  Apparently due to a round of antibiotics, my pill was no longer effective.  So there you go, take note of that...antibiotics + the pill = pregnancy!